Martha, Martha, Martha

I am somewhat puzzled by my affection for Martha Stewart. Yes, she's a hard-assed woman, who puts up with little crap from her guests (and yet invites Andy Dick back), she can cook, and craft, and wears impractical shoes. I get that. What I don't get is why I still watch when 9 out of 10 times the ideas she presents get the following reactions from me:

Hrm, that's clever. And cute. But a why on earth would I want to make a [insert given craft project]?

Wow, that's a creative idea. I bet I could buy one of those [insert given craft project] for a fraction of the effort, and twice the satisfaction, though.

Do people actually DO this stuff? Or just beat themselves up because they're not a good homemaker?

Why I am viewing crafting and cooking ideas for Thanksgiving/Halloween, when we don't do those holidays in New Zealand? And even if we did, pumpkins are for eating, and what kind of loonie gives away perfectly good lollies?

OK, so I do fold my fitted sheets the Martha way, and I do spout the odd bit of wisdom I've overhead (but have never used myself). It's not that I'm not a crafty person, either; I'm excellent at taking up new hobbies (not so good at sticking with them). I don't have a thing for blondes. I will admit to taking some delight in watching celebrities fumble and bumble their way through a segment, but I do hope that's not the reason I watch!

I think, deep down, I'm just waiting for the day she snaps, and takes to an errant guest with her wooden spoon. I hope it's Andy Dick.